Big Thighs and Curly Hair

(November 21, 2013) I just finished combing through my emails and came across a Holiday Greeting video that was sent out from my daughters school. It was a video of students and faculty passing a basket of food to one another and carrying it from location to location while staff and students expressed statements of personal gratitude. The video was well produced and edited to capture the beauty of the campus on a perfect autumn day.  I watched the video move from hand to hand listening to the statements of gratitude most of which were  the typical thankful form my family, for the students, for my friends, to play sports, you get the idea. The music that accompanied the video was familiar and kept my interest. But suddenly midway through the video I noticed that the basket was passed to my daughter. I was slightly taken aback but equally proud to see her. She was on the patio of Bettye’s Place, an on campus store. I was fixated on her and smiled broadly waiting to hear what she was thankful for. Would she be thankful for her parents, her school, or her family? As she reached for the basket with both hands she turned to the camera smiled broadly and said, “I am grateful for my big thighs and curly hair!” My immediate response was a giant burst of laughter. It was a perfect response. I rewound the video over and over smiling each time. “…big thighs and curly hair…” I smiled so wide my heart cheeks ached.

There's a Flag on the Play

(October 19, 2013) Boundaries are necessary, I get that. Knowing how far to go keeps us in the lane we’re supposed to be in. But what happens when the boundaries become smaller, when what formerly seemed normal is now considered the abnormal. We find ourselves changing our behavior and making adjustments trying to find our place.

In the firsts month of school my wife and I decided that it would be best to allow our daughter to stay on campus full time which to us means over the weekends. It has proven to be a very wise and successful move on all fronts and the transition had made all of our lives easier. Now our child comes home when she wants to be with us and trust me, we love it that way.

It Get's Better - I Promise

(September 23, 2013)Yesterday while sitting in the car of the school parking lot waiting for my wife to come down from our daughter’s dorm room, I saw friend walking solemnly toward her vehicle that was parked next to mine. She didn’t notice me but I watched her closely, her body language signaling to leave her alone. She sat in her car still and pensive and tired, but not physically tired, it was as though she was waiting for what she was thinking about to be over. I knew the look and feeling all too well. It was easy to identify. I allowed her to finish her thoughts before I rolled down my window. I stared in her direction hoping that she would see me in her peripheral vision. I didn’t want to be too intrusive, a characteristic my wife says I should exercise in moderation especially in her presence.  After several minutes and the intensity of the cramp in my neck from staring, I couldn’t help myself. “It gets better”, my voiced muffled through the closed window of her car.  Finally she looked my way smiled and rolled down her window. “It gets better”, I repeated. “Is it that obvious”, she replied.